I am not a confrontational person. I loathe conflict. I prefer peace and quiet. Yet I accept the fact that some conflict is inevitable. Some conflict is necessary. A pastor should not look for fights. Men of God must not be quarrelsome (2 Tim. 2:24). At the same time, we must not run from the fights we must fight. We must show up for the battles that matter. We must not stoop at standing time. Tough decisions, difficult conversations, loving confrontations go along with the territory. It's called leadership. But a servant-leader must know when to push an issue and...

  Things I have learned along the way… I have been in pastoral ministry for over 21 years now. I started my first pastorate when I was 17-years-old, still a senior in high school. I served Mt. Sinai Missionary Baptist Church in Los Angeles for almost 18 years. And it has been my privilege to serve the Shiloh Metropolitan Baptist Church in Jacksonville for a little more than 3 years now. I have learned a lot about pastoral ministry over these years. Of course, I still have quite a bit to learn. I hope to be a lifelong learner. But...

Going directly from a call to preach to leading a church is extremely rare. Good! Preachers need the maturation that comes from serving with or under another pastor, before leading their own congregation. Yet many associate ministers wish they could just skip this process. Pastors treat associates as flunkies. Congregations neglect the vital role associate ministers play. Members view associates as step-parents, substitute teachers, or “garbage-time” bench riders. It can be discouraging. But it doesn’t have to be. Your time as an associate minister can be an affirmation of your ministerial call, a time of spiritual development, and a fruitful...

I'll give you one guess who that handsome young man to the left is. Before I go any further, let me answer your burning question: Is that a Jheri Curl? Answer: Absolutely not! I only use juices and berries on my hair. Bonus Q&A: Yes, those are Gazelle glasses I am wearing. What you know about that?!?! This is a newspaper clip I found recently in a book. It is from local church newspaper in Los Angeles called the A.C.C. (R.I.P.) I was just eighteen-years-old. It is an advertisement for my first pastoral anniversary celebration at the Mt. Sinai Missionary Baptist...

I am a loyal Gospel Music fan. For years, I have joyfully collected Gospel CD recordings. More recently, I download music from iTunes. I rarely go anywhere without my iPod. Keys, wallets, cell phone, and iPod - don’t leave home without them! I love Gospel Music. Praise and worship. Traditional. Contemporary. Old school. New school. You name it. I like it all. Even quartet music is starting to grow on me! Ultimately, I love music. But I especially love Gospel Music. However, most of the Gospel Music on my iPod, I would absolutely freak out to hear performed in an...

I was ready to quit. For real, this time. I know I was serious, because I went to tell my pastor. I did not (do not) make major life decisions without talking to my pastor about it. How about you? I sat down in Pas' office. And I broke the news to him. I was resigning. I was too young and had too much ahead of me to waste any more time in this extended church conflict, or so I thought. Pas began to warn me about how difficult it is to organize a church from scratch. This warning was...

I was in the middle of a spectacular church fight. It was my first pastorate. I was barely 21. And I had reached my "Popeye" moment. "That's all I can stand, and I can't stands no more!" There were several out-of-town speaking engagements before me. I determined I would resign when I returned him home. I wanted to do something else. I wanted to get married. I wanted out of this foolish conflict with church people. I did not know what I would do next. When asked, I would say that I planned to become a talk show host. But...

O my Lord, Let not my ministry be approved only by men, or merely to win the esteem and affections of people; But do the work of grace in their hearts, call in thy elect, seal and edify the regenerate ones, and command eternal blessings on their souls. Save me from self-opinion and self-seeking; Water the hearts of those who hear thy Word, that seed sown in weakness may be raised in power; Cause me and those that hear me to behold thee here in the light of special faith, and hereafter in the blaze of endless glory; Make my...

The people of God will follow the pastor who feeds them the Wordof God. That isn’t to say that they won’t balk once in a while. They can makethe pastor’s life a living hell. But week in and week out, year in and yearout, Christians will not cut themselves off from the one who sets theirspiritual table. Even the delinquent son has an uncanny sense of when dinner’son, and he knows he will not be refused. While the people of God want desperately to flock to thespiritual food of the Word of God, pastors flock to seminars on how to...

When I catch myself comparing myself to others or thinking, I could be happy if only I had what they have, then I know i need to withdraw for a while and listen for another voice. Away from the winds, earthquakes, and fires of human recognition, I can again hear the still, small voice, posing the question it always asks of self-absorbed ministers: What are you doing here? I reply by whining about some of my Ahabs and Jezebels, And the voice gently reminds me, as it has reminded thousands of Elijahs before me, that I am only a small...

Many people view pastors as a caricature. Pastors are seen through the lens of communications kings, so “mega-church pastors, and all the religious hypocrites who masquerade as men of God. But this is not the reality. All of this country, there are sincere, godly, faithful men who persevere in guarding their lifestyle and their doctrine (1 Timothy 4:16). But, of course, these are not the men who get most of the attention. A pastor usually has to be a great success or a miserable failure for people to notice him. And this leaves out the vast majority who are humble,...

This afternoon, my friend Keelan Atkinson and I were talking about about spiritual leadership, church life, and pastoral ministry.  To both warn and encourage me to keep my priorities straight in the days to come, Keelan shared with me a story that the late Pastor D.J. Ward told him some years ago. After he told me the story and we discussed it some, I asked if I share it on my blog. Actually, I think I announced that I was going to post it, rather than just asking. But Keelan was gracious and encouraged me to do so. I promised...